Little ones, I have a dilema.
So . Yesterday night my boss (not the shop one; the horse one) offered me a full time job when I finish school, training and looking after horses with him. And I said YES !
But since then I've gotten a little scared. Even though it's a good couple of months away; it's still pretty soon - all things considered.
The only other thing I've really wanted to do is spraypaint cars (wanted to be a mechanic, decided against it as I have tits and a lot of the guys who do it would have a massive problem with that). But I have ALWAYS wanted to work with horses. And I've taken every opportunity to do so.
But now that the opportunity is right around the corner I'm kind of wondering if that's where my life should go. I mean; horses are a dangerous business. If you get a bad enough injury; even if a horse just pulls you over - it can fuck you up for life. And I know it's more dangerous to get in a car and drive; or even just cross the road. But if horses are your life there's no real career in it if you get badly injured.
And what if I get sick of it? I mean, I can't imagine ever getting bored of horses. But it could happen right? And if I chose to do this it means that I don't have much experience in any other career path. And experience is all I have going for me when it comes to job applications and employment in general. I'm not academically the brightest of sparks. I can deal with people really well; bit who's gunna want to hire a chick whose biggest education highlight was learning how to read the time at the age of 17?
Worst of all; what if I'm shit! I can deal with horses real well on the ground. My boss wouldn't trust me to look after the stallions (especially when they're around the mares) if I couldn't. But I'm so nervous when it comes to riding that I just can't. And even when I do build my confidence up; I'm so bloody fragile when the slightest thing comes along and makes me lose it.
Oh well.
Let's be honest though; I never feel even close to as alive as I do when I'm with the horses; doing anything else. If it was a choice between sex, Macca's and horses I'd totally become a skinny-bitch celibate. I'd do pretty much anything where a horse is involved. Except, perhaps, riding them all! Haha
Dream chasing here I come :)
